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Here I am, to pick up my steps over these endless ruins, with a load on my back.
I come to You for consolation, for relief,
and now the strength in me trickles away,
and I am gnawed by grief that never sleeps.
With immense effort I cross
the terrors of this endless Night,
enfeebled by the cynicism of
these false witnesses
who plague my innocence all day long.
It was Your pleasure to give me
the key on matters my soul
could have never understood alone,
on marvels beyond me and
my knowledge,
and for this reason they
hound my innocence.
There, in every obscure corner
they await for an opportunity to
plunder my life if that were possible.
They call themselves Your people,
thinking their mouth is heaven,
but what they proffer is false,
fallacious and misleading.
I am trying to be bold and
show a bold face around
but they are constantly gnawing on me.
The godless have more charity and
humility than those who claim
they follow Your Law but
never stop judging and
have not the least
hesitation to condemn, bringing
misery crashing down on me.
Were they godless who judge me,
I could put up with that,
but THEY, who call themselves
Your people! people of God!
to whom baptism bounds us
together in Your House ....
I complain, but have I not the right
to unload my burden on to
You Lord now and then?
Yes, I know I sound and
I look like a walking Lamentations Book,
but I live my life in innocence,
so relieve me for just a while Lord!
Vassula .... do not fret and wail bitterly while being nailed on My Cross, take Me as an example of dignity; soon the darnel will be pulled up from the wheat before any one of you realizes; I have rescued you many times from the snares of your enemies who hoped to destroy you; then, daughter, why do you fear the terrors of the Night? I am only combatting inside you .... leave Me alone when I am on My way to the inner room of your soul:
My Dwelling Place;
I have told you before that your soul will leap like on fire every time My Hand falls shattering My rivals that take My place  I am Master and intend to remain your Master; I have set you as My Target for My arrows, no, Vassula, grace does not go without suffering, oh, what will I not do to My closest ones, to My dearest friends! 1
Then, allow me to take the words of
Saint Theresa of Avila and tell You:
no wonder You have so few friends!
all men are weak .... nevertheless, I will reply to your comment and tell you: if your soul only knew what I am offering and doing to you, you would have been the one to ask Me for more trials, sufferings, crosses, the lot! - I discipline those I love so do not object to what seems good to Me; you are My jewel and like some precious stone, I cut, carve and form you into the shape I have in Mind; therefore, I tell you, as long as you have breath inside you, you must carry out the work I, Myself, have given you as for those who call themselves Mine yet are offensive when it comes to spiritual matters, I tell them: "if you were blind you would not be guilty, but since you say, 'we see and can tell', your guilt remains! how many times will I have to reproach them for their incredulity and obstinacy?
come, be in Peace - I am with you for the rest of your journey;
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